I was born during a cold winter.  My birth was delayed due to snow.  Once I got out, without sayin hello some guy in white dress slapped me in the butt.  I filed a lawsuit, but it was dropped since that was a "medical procedure".   I went through some amazing years as any little thing I did was accepted as major accomplishment.  I start walkin everybody is happy.  They want me to walk towards them.  I say somethin everybody wants to hear.  Sadly, nobody got what I said right.  I guess they heard what they wanted to hear.

I would have to say the best part was that I didn't have to go the bathroom.  I would just go and somebody would clean up the mess.  I had personal assistants that would take care of everything about me.  Feed me, clean me, dress me, burp me, ride me..... anything.